![\"Dorothy_Parker\"](\"http:\/\/www.robertlpeters.com\/news2013\/wp-content\/uploads\/Dorothy_Parker1.jpg\" "\\"Dorothy_Parker\\"")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Long Branch, New Jersey<\/em><\/p>\n Dorothy Parker<\/a> (1893-1967) was a left-leaning American writer best known for her wit, wisecracks, and sharp eye for 20th century urban foibles. From a conflicted and unhappy childhood, she rose to considerable acclaim\u2014both for her literary output and as a critic in such venues as The New Yorker<\/em>, Vogue<\/em>, and Vanity Fair<\/em>, and as a founding member of the Algonquin Round Table<\/a>.<\/p>\n Her pointed witticisms and satirical aphorisms live on\u2026<\/p>\n +\u00a0 +\u00a0 +<\/p>\n The first thing I do in the morning You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks.<\/span><\/p>\n Women and elephants never forget.<\/span><\/p>\n Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n If you want to know what God thinks of money, The cure for boredom is curiosity. I like to have a martini, I’d rather have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.<\/span><\/p>\n You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think. The best way to keep children at home Brevity is the soul of lingerie.<\/span><\/p>\n Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.<\/span><\/p>\n They sicken of the calm, who know the storm.<\/span><\/p>\n Constant use had not worn ragged the fabric of their friendship.<\/span><\/p>\n Her big heart did not, as is so sadly often the case, inhabit a big bosom.<\/span><\/p>\n Salary is no object: I want only enough to keep body and soul apart.<\/span><\/p>\n If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style<\/em>. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they\u2019re happy.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Long Branch, New Jersey Dorothy Parker (1893-1967) was a left-leaning American writer best known for her wit, wisecracks, and sharp eye for 20th century urban foibles. From a conflicted and unhappy childhood, she rose to considerable acclaim\u2014both for her literary output and as a critic in such venues as The New Yorker, Vogue, and Vanity […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,5,8,13,18],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4995"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4995"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4995\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15403,"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4995\/revisions\/15403"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4995"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4995"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/robertlpeters.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4995"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nis brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.<\/span><\/p>\n
\njust look at the people he gave it to.<\/span><\/p>\n
\nThere is no cure for curiosity.<\/span><\/p>\n
\n<\/em>Two at the very most.<\/span>
\nAfter three I’m under the table,<\/span>
\nafter four I’m under my host.<\/span><\/p>\n
\n(when asked to use “horticulture” in a sentence)<\/span><\/p>\n
\nis to make the home atmosphere pleasant,<\/span>
\nand let the air out of the tires.<\/span><\/p>\n